Jango's Jargon

Welcome to Jango's Jargon - Volume 2!

In this corner, wearing the trademark plaid shirt, extra deep pocketed pants, and gray beard, Uncle George!

In the other corner we have.. well.. the 99% of the worlds Star Wars fans that think "Hyperspace" is a joke.

Yep. This weeks topic is the new StarWars.com feature, "Hyperspace". Basically, "Hyperspace" is an online service offered by StarWars.com which offers subscribers the a poodoo load of features for a $19.99 annual fee. Fair or unfair? You decide. Read on, fanboy.

Heres what you'll get! Episode III Set Diary, for those who like to read. Episode III Webcam, for the Star Voyeur in you, Deleted scenes, a "photoreceptor" for "rare photos" that will be leaked after the first week of availability anyway, Classic Bantha Tracks, a Star Wars themed e-mail address, live online chats w/ celebrities that claim they are someone important, and best of all.. NO POP UPS!

So,exactly who in the blue milk did they poll for this new service? His daughters who just "decided" they wanna buy "*N Sync"? Have we as fans and collectors not lined his pockets enough with every action figure, coffee mug, and pair of socks that he "offically licenses"? Granted, $19.99 ain't a whole lot of money, but the basic principle here is that stuff like this should be free, regardless of it's scarcity or rarity. The Lucas dynasty makes meellions upon MEELLIONS of dollars from us through films, marketing, royalties, etc. Don't we, as fans who make this happen, deserve something more than an "official" website which really serves no other purpose than providing a searchable database and a fan store that has the same crap as this time last year?

Now, for a fair and balanced assessment of "Hyperspace".

The cons of this service are pretty obvious. Thats enough un-incentive for me. 300 Jango items, George. THREE HUNDRED! How 'bout you do something for ME! I digress.

I suppose in theory, the perks are just as obvious. They've set up a "discounted" rate for fan club members and I believe "Insider" subscribers, which is like 1/2 price. Not bad. You'll get a lot of exclusive content, free stuff, and the crown jewel of freebies.. NO POP- UPS! If you ask me, shell out the scratch, enjoy it, but this stuff will be leak quicker than Rick McCallum can say "Yes, George!"

So, what do we do? Fight the power and wait and see if this stuff does make it outside of it's intended, paying audience? Or, do we just cough up a $20 and gets to clickin'?

This projects fate will ultimately be decided by you, the fans. Alls I got to say is the day I sign up for "Hyperspace" is the day that Mr. Lucas signs to release the O.T. on DVD.

Sound fair? I thought so.

Until next week, boyos!

Jargon Archive!