Author Topic: TALES OF THE 305TH #2, PART 2- A DANGEROUS SITUATION  (Read 918 times)

Offline Nirvana

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TALES OF THE 305TH #2, PART 2- A DANGEROUS SITUATION
« on: November 20, 2005, 05:37 PM »
GRAND ARMY OF THE REPUBLIC MISSION LOG
STAFF SARGEANT LISTER, LEGION OF THE 305TH

       A.R.E.G COMMAND

  "Darn," the leader growled, alone in his quarters.

 He knew that the Republic had captured Jack Worvet, their sniper, and he was an easy talker. He would spill the groups plans, who they are, where their base is, everything. He knew it was coming and despised it. Everything that he had worked hard at might crumble around his shoulders very soon.


INTERROGATION ROOM, REPUBLIC COMMAND


      The POW extremist was suprisingly calm.

He knew he was going to die, and welcomed it. He was not going to allow himself die at the hands of his interrogator, though. He formulated a plan. There was a weapons locker in the corner of the room, but it needed a five-digit passcode. If his luck was running high, a Jedi would be his man.
His luck was running high.

"Ok, slime," the Jedi said. "We can do this the hard way or the easy way. I'd like it to be easy." "I will tell you everything you need to know," the extermist said unfalteringly. "Anything you want." The Jed smiled. "Excellent. Who are you?"
"Jack Worvet, AREG sniper."
"What is this whole AREG group?"
"We are the Anti-Republic Extemist Group."
"Why didn't you just join the CIS?"
"We do not condone fighting alongside machines."
"Why pick Kashykk?"
"For privacy. We didn't want anyone finding out, but unfortunately your Clone Intelligence is more alert than we thought."
" I see. But why-"
The extremist grabbed the Jedi's lightsaber hilt from his belt. In one fluid motion, we flipped it right side up, activated it, and held it inches away from the Jedi's neck.


MEANWHILE

OUTSIDE COMMAND
 "The spooks over in Intelligence don't want you to be in danger anymore. Your duties are now patrolling the forest perimeter around the base. I'm sorry, Sargeant."

"What?! That's so stupid!" I said. "Why?" "I don't know," Commander Rayders shook his head sadly. "I didn't agree with it either, but orders are orders." "Yes sir," I saluted half-heartedly and walked into the forest to carry out my crazy orders.

INTERROGATION ROOM, REPUBLIC COMMAND

The Jedi drew in a sharp intake of breath. "No," He whispered. "Please, don't!"

"I don't want to," he said, lying. "I really don't." "Now," he continued, "Open up that weapons locker over there. No funny business if you value your life." The Jedi slowly walked the weapons locker and opened it.

"Back away," he said firmly. He took out a DC-17 and a pistol. "These should suffice."

KASHYKK WILDERNESS

    I walked through the wilderness, fuming about what Intelligence did to me.

 "I'm a sniper!" I thought. "Why?" I walked into a swamp absentmindedly, still thinking about it. I suddenly became face to face with another downed ARC.

"Hmm," I thought. "What brought this one down." I was still thinking about it when heavy breathing caused me to turn around.

I became face to face with a hideous monster. Rotten breath, leathery skin and filthy teeth almost made me retch. It also had a hand-made leather bandolier. I immediately raised my rifle and squeezed off two bursts from it into the chest of the beast, with dismal results. It just got mad.

Before I could react, it brought down one of its mighty claws on me, catching me in the chest and knocking the wind out of me.


I didn't look back. I rolled off the hull and sprinted off into the cover of the trees, running in the general direction of Command.



INTERROGATION ROOM, REPUBLIC COMMAND

     "Thank you for your service," Jack Worvet said cheerfully. "But you really thought I would spill all of my organization's secrets?" Jack delivered a deadly slash across the chest to the Jedi.




KASHYKK WILDERNESS


    Command was soon in sight. I started running a little faster when I saw it was in fire. Walking in, I saw that the Comms room was in flames, and raised my rifle to my chest. Walking into the foyer, I saw that we had a serious situation on hand. I walked up to the Intelligence leader, Corporal Harland. "What the heck is going on here?" I demanded.

"POW managed to kill our Jedi commander and take Commander Rayders hostage." "I was waiting for you to show up to take him out."
"Ok," I replied. "I have a plan. I'll shoot his hand so he'll drop the gun. As soon as I do that, you and your clones load into him." "Agreed," Corporal Harland said. I moved into position, took aim and fired. As soon as he got hit, he yelled and dropped his pistol. Commander Rayders scrambeled to get back to take cover.

The clones followed the plan to the letter. They lit up the rebel, his body shaking as he went down.


This time, he was down for good.

Commander Rayders, Corporal Harland, and I were discussing the situation after he was taken care of.

"He killed the Jedi, taking all of the information down with him," Corporal Harland informed. "But luckily, there was a security device in the room." "We have all of it recorded."
"Good," I replied. I then told them about my experience in the forest, and about the beast that attacked me. I showed them the scractes on my armor. They were concerned. "Let's ask Gerthag, our Wookie translator," Rayders suggested.
We spoke to him. He recognized what we were talking about, and he said that it terrorized their village when he was a child. The local population called it Wefdas.

I still didn't realize what it was, but I hoped to God I wouldn't see it again.

AREG COMMAND

    Their leader sensed that Jack had died. He was careless.

What he didn't know was that we knew where he was. Looking at the security recordings, Jack said that their headquarters were in that abandoned building he had held me at gunpoint in. I wasn't suprised. That's why he was there. I smiled. Now we can show the AREG what the Republic does to traitors.




TO BE CONTINUED....



I hope you like it. Any comments/suggestions appreciated.


« Last Edit: November 22, 2005, 09:51 PM by darth_nirvana »
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Offline CHEWIE

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Re: TALES OF THE 305TH #2, PART 2- A DANGEROUS SITUATION
« Reply #1 on: November 21, 2005, 01:32 AM »
Already another chapter?  I can't keep up!   ;D

I should be able to read this one in full detail tomorrow and give you my thougths.

 :P

Offline CHEWIE

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Re: TALES OF THE 305TH #2, PART 2- A DANGEROUS SITUATION
« Reply #2 on: November 21, 2005, 10:44 AM »
Ok, got to read it.  Definitely an interesting addition to your series.  It's customary to give praise and suggestions here, so that's exactly what I will do!

- I really like the use of the leader of the organization.  He's a shady and mysterious character.  Seems pretty evil!

- The customs are great.  Really add a sense of a larger galaxy.

- Good use of the landscape shrubs to add to a forest look.

- The creature attacking Lister was cool, reminded me of a large Wampa.  Would have been cool to have seen its face though.

- Nice to see that new Wookiee in there, but I think maybe a different name would have been better as Dengar is a well known bounty hunter.  Still though, it's not like there can't be more than one Dengar in the galaxy.

- There were a few more typos in this one, like "we" should be "he" and "Kashyk" is spelled "Kashyyyk."

- I was stunned to see a Jedi get tricked so easily... also, I thought it was Ki Adi Mundi, but I guess it wasn't?  Who was he supposed to be?

- Also, I don't know why they would try and shoot his hand if they're gonna kill him anyway.  Why not just load into him right off the bat?

- Overall great storytelling though.  Really looking forward to seeing what this mysterious leader is all about.

 :P


Offline In Rem

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Re: TALES OF THE 305TH #2, PART 2- A DANGEROUS SITUATION
« Reply #3 on: November 21, 2005, 10:52 AM »
I would echo CHEWIE's comments and suggestions. I really like how you're keeping things in a more military vein. At the same time, I would like to know who that Jedi was... I thought it was K-AM, too. And when he did get the drop on the Jedi, I didn't really understand how... it was just like *boom*, he has the lightsaber. Perhaps another photo could have set that up for us?

The customs are cool. I like how you're incorporating a lot of downed ARC fighters; it gives me the impression that the Extremists are very well armed and equipped for more of a battle than your Clones are.

Way to go. I look forward to another installment.

Offline Nirvana

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Re: TALES OF THE 305TH #2, PART 2- A DANGEROUS SITUATION
« Reply #4 on: November 21, 2005, 03:04 PM »
Yeah, you guys are right. Well, I know what happens to Ki-Adi, so he was just another Jedi, sorry if I didn't have that come across so easily. If I showed you his face, HALO players would have recognized it off the bat. This is Star Wars, not Halo. I forgot about Dengar! That didn't even register to me when I was proofing, so did the typos. I made up a name for him, and I didn't catch it. I'll change the name. I had a pic of the extermist noticing that his lightsaber was in plain sight, and I was going to have the Jedi with his hands behind his back, I just didn't see it. Lister shot his hand to let go of the pistol because before you die, you have natural tension in your body for a couple seconds. The pistol would have gone off and got Rayders in the head. But thanks for all of the positve comments I'm getting, I really enjoy making these.
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Offline CHEWIE

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Re: TALES OF THE 305TH #2, PART 2- A DANGEROUS SITUATION
« Reply #5 on: November 21, 2005, 03:16 PM »
Glad you are enjoying them, we are too.   :)

And it's cool that you have an open mind about our suggestions.  It makes this section so much better. 

Looking forward to seeing what you have up your sleeve next!

 :P

Offline Nirvana

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Re: TALES OF THE 305TH #2, PART 2- A DANGEROUS SITUATION
« Reply #6 on: November 21, 2005, 03:39 PM »
Thanks. I think I'm going to have Harland more prominent in the next one, and the leader having a confrontation with Lister.
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Offline Joe

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Re: TALES OF THE 305TH #2, PART 2- A DANGEROUS SITUATION
« Reply #7 on: November 21, 2005, 04:15 PM »
about the Halo...I noticed it was A brute (the brute leader...)   



o.k. back on track.....

I love your story telling and that "milartary" feel.Only thing I suggest is to give it more of an enviormnt....dont let any wood floor wall show....make a BIG "box" if you have to.O and I would like to see some blasters shots too....

Overal another great addition.
Cheers!

 - Joe

Offline Nirvana

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Re: TALES OF THE 305TH #2, PART 2- A DANGEROUS SITUATION
« Reply #8 on: November 21, 2005, 04:22 PM »
Yeah, Tartarus. I wanted some beast to confront Lister. I'm still working on the right environment. I don't have Photoshop, so they might have to be MSPaint. Thanks for your comments.
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