Author Topic: Memoirs of a War Profiteer S1/E2: "The Unknown Battle of Wayland"  (Read 2238 times)

Offline Darth Depressis

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Dilbun: (narration) you know with all that noise and light you'd figure these force enhanced diaper bags wouldn't be such a problem. historically speaking. i mean their weapon of choice leaves em without the element of surprise. like gee theres something robed glowing and humming in the corner what could that be?

Wayland-20 years Before the Battle of Yavin IV



Nikkos Tyris:(sparring with Tol Skorr) as i've demonstrated the weakness is not in your style, it is your cowardice towards the dark side.

Tol Skorr:(attempting death blow)you ferglutz!




Asajj Ventress:(locking blades with Tyris) there will be no room for your Jensaarai when the sith hold dominion over this galaxy!



Nikkos Tyris:(deflecting death blow via force leviatate) your logic in such matters isn't of importance!

before the three can kill one another, Sora Bulq separates them via the force.



Sora Bulq: your anger towards one another will be a beacon to our prey! separate! go on your patrols and hide yourselves in the predatory urges of this jungle.

Asajj Ventress: (disengaging sabers) the count does not abide my mistreatment bulq! you will regret this.



Sora Bulq: one trained by the jedi never holds such physical distractions above the will of the force. run along girl.

Ventress flees into the canopy, while Tyris and Skorr stand maintaining defensive positions against one another.



Sora Bulq: i will not repeat an order. disengage!

Skorr force leaps into the jungle after Ventress. Tyris turns his saber towards Bulq.



Nikkos Tyris: Come now saber Master are you willing to test yourself against my style?

Sora Bulq: i no longer hold that title, but it does not mean my blade would falter before the likes of Cin Drallig or yourself. disengage tyris, the masters require your services in the future, or the so force tells me.

Dilbun: (narration) much like their count, these kath hounds still have that jedi stiffness about them. not at all like ol' augie or even ventress. but even with my utter disregard for them, i fail to see my purpose in this mission? why em i leading them. they supposedly got themselves tuned into that kriffing force! shouldn't it be essential to killing one of their kind?   

Nikkos Tyris: amusing how much self doubt clouds his mind. your soup would be spicy Vont, it really is too bad your of importance.

Dilbun: (narration) nosey brain sucking scum!

Dilbun Vont: good thing ol' augie's got the say so over you dweebs. must confess i've been winning every bet i place on the outcome of this war's engagements, and where the kriff has dooku been stowing your suck face tyris?

Nikkos Tyris: Force Sensitive Anzati are in short supply, there really is no better way to imprint our organic operatives.

Phutt Nuum: in other words you bein crawling all over solider laps for the duration of the war eh? they at-least tip you for your dance?



Nikkos Tyris:(force choking Nuum) may i remind you of which side you serve in this war Death Watchmen. yours is a life i may end at anytime.

Dilbun Vont: call off yur Akk dog Bulq, Nuum's part of my team!

Sora Bulq: your role as team leader is noted Vont, but we have no standing orders to leave anyone but yourself unharmed.


Dilbun Vont: Black Opps-i envoke Order 23. exterminate confederate agents.

Trachta, Gauer and J'mee Fett pull their blasters and open fire upon Tyris and Bulq. the Dark Jedi deflect the energy bolts and release Phutt Nuum whom collapses into the foilage.



Dilbun Vont: Black Opps-stand down. Nuum git your hid in line, I'm not ordering the execution of these force dweebs for yer worthless life got it?



Sora Bulq: let us get within range of your pitiful band next time vont, bacta won't be any help. i promise it.

Gauer: either way your ass would be the first down. kinda hard to be so cocky with a vibroblade up your...

Dilbun Vont: Black Opps- patrol the perm, Gauer git me holos of Doneeta bathing down by the lake on the double. Tractha keep outta the rain don't need ya shorting out on us in the thick of it eh? Fett yer wit me.


Nikkos Tyris: what about your mando, you giving him to us after that little show of force?

Phutt Nuum:(choking)

Tractha: I'll keep an eye on him commander.

the group divides, Sora Bulq and Vont take up a monitoring position overlooking the incomplete Mt. Tantis storehouse.



Sora Bulq: it's good you seek to relieve your tensions with holos of the twi'lek. your mind must be in its usual state for this mission.

Dilbun Vont: never had anybody encourage me to do that befere, eh. so why the hell em i even here let alone leading this tactic-less mission? what is the kriffing plan, i'm the commander and nobodies seen fit to advise me of tha damn thing?

Sora Bulq: just clear your head vont, kill something. make time with Sha'ala, whatever it takes. all i can advise you to do is be yourself.

Dilbun Vont: any hints given to you Fett?

J'mee Fett: tactically speaking this mission shouldn't be of any concern to you Commander. we are five special units and five Confederate Lieutenants strong with battle divisions in play all around the system. the intel provided upon our target suggests one Dark Jedi with a Slicer is all we face. 

Sora Bulq: all true enough clone, but your flash-trained mind fails to grasp the gravity of our situation. our masters can blanket this area with battles all they wish, should we fail to destroy Fai'rel here and he escapes with proof of the truth. we face a revolution led by the Jedi.

Dilbun Vont: don't give me that bull, the sith are playing both sides of this game, what the hell would change if the populace found out? and the jedi. come on who they gonna led against two war machines?

Sora Bulq: you assume the Sith Lords could maintain their forces after exposure. this war is built upon broken promises, false claims and of-course  those whom believe in its underlying purpose; keeping this one united galaxy.


Dilbun Vont: which it never bein! never will be and quite frankly in all sanity should never be.

Sora Bulq: (exiting the ridge)so says the war Profiteer.

Dilbun: (narration) five of these bastards, Dooku's elite. and a group assembled by tarkin as suggested by ol'augie. the Dark Jedi being here i understand, but my black opps? were the covert berserker squad? assassins of the assassins! all stranded on this jungle hell hole awaiting that Bpfhashi clown.


Acclamator I-class assault ship: Bloodsport
approaching orbit of Wayland



Kiev Plau: as i've said before we cannot interfere with the natural progression of sentient affairs.

Fai'rel: why can't your order see the purpose in my actions! the sith will rule and they must be stopped.

Kiev Plau: exposure will not put an end to the violence that shrouds this galaxy. you will find yourself engaging your enemies in blood soaked worlds for the remainder of your existence.



Fai'rel: the twelve of you united with the jedi order could eliminate the sith yet you seek to continue your orders secrecy! and you decry my efforts to expose them.



Kiev Plau: we are connected in life via the force, its entire spectrum. we cannot do battle with those completely devoted to either of its halves and survive. our work is too important to involve ourselves with this ancient feud between your orders.

Fai'rel: then you consign my mission to failure and you condone the coming darkness!



Kiev Plau: our invitation still stands, despite your allegiance with the dark side. if you could but look past these petty sentient troubles and join us in maintaining this stellar body.

Fai'rel: i utilize the dark side in my efforts against the sith as all the jedi should! nevertheless i refuse, you'd might as well go if you will not aid me in my coming struggle.



Kiev Plau: (fading away) i was never here.

Fai'rel: such power..wasted.

frustrated the dark jedi exits his chamber and enters the deserted bridge of the star destroyer. at the main com station sits Kligson. whom quickly approaches Fai'rel noticing his entrance.



Kligson: i gotta tell you, this force stuff along with my slicing skills could find a guy running the galaxy.

Fai'rel: it already has.

Kligson: oh yeah, umm. i've got a LAAT prepped in the docking bay if you're ready to go down to the surface.

Fai'rel: very good, do you have this ship slaved to your suit? should we require it's further assistance?

Kligson: as you requested. now once you've got what you want, i can keep the suit right?



Fai'rel: it is your design, is it not? plus the funds you siphoned to construct it never really existed so even by jedi logic it is yours to do with as you please.

Kligson: and i'll be free to go my own way after this right?

Fai'rel: are you implying our partnership has been less than beneficial for you?   



Kligson: its not that sir. i just wanna get away from all of this mess, all these people. slicing my way is great fun and all but being continually around beings unable to see a simple number scam coming down on them has taken its toll upon me.

Fai'rel: why is it everyone i require aid from seeks to remove themselves from sentient concerns?

Wayland- twenty clicks from Mt. Tantiss



Dilbun Vont: honest Sha'ala. i'll never go near another Force-Sensitive strum.

Sha'ala Doneeta: (force choking) i'm not a strum!

Dilbun Vont: (choking mid-air) coulda fooled ma twenty minutes agooo....

Sha'ala Doneeta: (force choking) that's it slime-ball you're dead.



in a flash of motion J'mee Fett bursts onto the scene and subdues the force sensitive twi'lek with a upper cut to the jaw as applied while pulling back her lekku. the genetically pampered woman goes down without calling upon her Force enhanced skills.

Dilbun Vont: wow, you must really like me.



J'mee Fett: do not confuse loyalty to the command structure with your physical urges commander.

Dilbun Vont: (exiting tent) sounds like you nevea had a brush wit yur own urges lady...my condolences.



Trachta: the dark jedi say they have sensed the prescience of Fai'rel aboard a venator that just entered orbit.

Dilbun Vont: a Acclamator! man that boy can slice his way anywhere!

Sha'ala Doneeta: It is more likely that Fai'rel subdued the mental capacity of the ships crew for the duration of their journey.

Dilbun Vont: imagine what he coulda accomplished if he'd had you tagging along wit him.

Sha'ala Doneeta: you son of a...

 Sora Bulq,Asajj Ventress,Nikkos Tyris and Tol Skorr descend upon the scene from the treetops.



Asajj Ventress: get your gear Doneeta! the currents of the force are clearing.

Dilbun Vont: what brings the saber jockeys out of their trees?

Sora Bulq: It is time. but things are happening too simply, Fai'rel senses us. but his ship comes this way. without a concern.

Dilbun Vont: wow so this is the extent of the all seeing eye of the force, i'm startin to git why the sith put me in charge of this gaggle of kriffing...



suddenly turbolaser blasts erupt all along the ridge. and a massive shadow covers the ensuing firestorm. the laat soars above the ridge carrying the openly gloating Fai'rel. the Dark Jedi attempt to board the Laat as more turbolaser blasts rattle the ridge. the group takes notice of the Acclamator I-class  Star Destroyer descending upon the ridge nose first.

Sora Bulq: (using the force) get your group outta here dilbun! get to the storehouse we'll handle this!

Dilbun Vont: good enough for me! black opps move out!

the dark jedi join in a battle meld to start pushing back the turbolaser blasts at the star destroyer while pushing it away from themselves. stray blasts continue to blanket the jungle as the dark jedi struggle to bring down the destroyer.


Asajj Ventress and Nikkos Tyris spring from the ground thus leaving the battle meld's objective and attempt to inflict physical damage upon the ship with their lightsabers.



the two run along hull of the mighty vessel pulling apart large portions of the vessel via the force and hurling them at the bridge.


large chunks connect and destroy the command tower, the turbolasers fall silent. Sora Bulq, Tol Skorr and Sha'ala Doneeta release their hold upon the vessel and propel themselves via the force from the ridge as the mighty destroyer smashes nose first into the ground exploding.



the Dark Jedi come to ground within paces of the Storehouse, utterly exhausted from the effort they fall to their knees to regain their energy.



Asajj Ventress: what are we doing! Sith do not require rest we serve the dark side!

Sora Bulq: (force choking and levitating) we are not sith! we serve the dark lords. if they chose to elevate us by doing away with one another so be it, that is the way of it girl! so quit mistaking your pathetic skills and our status in the grand scheme of things.

Tol Skorr: (attempting to stand) put her down Bulq! we have the mission to complete...vont's as good as dead!



Asajj Ventress: (hurling a rock at Bulq) do not defend me Skorr! i can take care of myself!

Sora Bulq collapses. Nikkos Tyris ignites his lightsaber and guards the passed out Dark Jedi.

Nikkos Tyris: what is this! infighting while the mission rests within the hands of a insane murderer and his crew of republic scum. Doneeta revive bulq!

Sha'ala Doneeta: (force healing bulq) it's a deep crack, this will take long.

Asajj Ventress: leave him for dead! the weak shall not hold back the will of the mighty!



Ventress attempts to storm into the storehouse, but is almost cleaved in half by the blade of Nikkos Tyris. Ventress ignites her blades and engages Tyris briefly.

Tol Skorr: we don't have time for this!

Nikkos Tyris: agreed, ventress and Doneeta come with me. Skorr heal Sora's injuries and join us inside!

Asajj Ventress: (force leaping) I'm leading this charge Jensaarai!



the three dark jedi advance into the mighty structure of Mr. Tantiss.

Fai'rel and Kligson enter the citadel of Mt. Tantiss, upon entering they are met by a shadowy figure.



Joruus C'baoth: who dares disturb my domain? who dares to trespass the storehouse of Mt Tantiss!

Fai'rel: master C'baoth, it is your loyal apprentice returned to your service after having strayed from the light for so long. come let us expose the shame of this war, let us triumph over the Sith.



Guardian of Mt. Tantiss: We have no Apprentice!

the dark jedi is bombarded by streams of dark force lightening, reacting quickly Fai'rel ignites his lightsaber and unleashes a wave at C'baoth. The Bpfasshi turns around to deflect another salvo coming from the shadows. the flickers reveal another C'baoth. in this moment Fai'rel understands the truth of the matter. his master never returned from the Outbound Flight experiment.

Fai'rel: Clones! i should have known the sith would use that perversion to any end. 

Jorruss C'baoth: i am Master C'baoth!

Joruus C'baoth: i am master C'baoth!

Fai'rel: you are nothing but diluted copies of a great man!



Joruus C'baoth: (turning on the other clone) begone dark sider!



the clones attack one another with all aspects of force combat, Fai'rel attempts to flee the melee as Kligson enters the room. fully adorned in cybernetic armor.

Kligson: (firing stun pulse) we can still get what we came here for!

the stun pulse strikes one of the clones, giving the other the leeway needed to deliver the deathblow. using the force Joruus removes the other c'baoth clones head from its body and explodes it with force lightening.





Joruus C'baoth: how could i not have seen it all this time!

Kligson: I'm thinking they must've cooked this guy up in those Sparrti cylinders we saw on the way in.

Fai'rel: clone madness, if only it where curable. but still he is all the proof we'd nee...



Blaster bolts flare to life just past the dark jedi's shoulder. Gauer, Dilbun Vont,Phutt Nuum,Tractha,and J'mee Fett storm into the citadel pumping out rounds. Fai'rel deflects and absorbs rounds while advancing towards the squad.



Kligson attempts to fire his stun pulse again, preempting the attack C'baoth lets loose a burst of Force Lightening frying and fusing the suit to Kligson. the young slicer passes out as the clone turns its attention the back of the blaster deflecting Dark Jedi.

Fai'rel: (deflecting blaster fire) well if we meet again vont it will be in the nether realm of the force!

Dilbun Vont: you're just a job pal, hurry up and catch one of these bolts will ya!

Fai'rel: (force pushing vont,tractha,Fett) i'll deal with you later.

The dark jedi turns his attention towards Gauer and Phutt Nuum, seeing the scale of their fight closing in around him. Gauer takes ahold of Phutt Nuum and proceeds to use him as a human shield. the marksman dances around the lightsaber strikes of the dark jedi effortlessly as Phutt screams while loosing whole portions of his body to the deadly strikes.



Gauer: (as phutt is beheaded) probably the best use he ever got outta that beskar. 



Fai'rel: oh indeed, pity he ever returned from Toola. as for you...

the dark jedi is cut short by a blast of force lightening from the clone of C'baoth. both Gauer and Fai'rel are sent flying to the ground from the blast. at that moment Asajj Ventress, Nikkos Tyris and Sha'ala Doneeta enter the citadel with sabers drawn. the three connect with the bursts of energy via their lightsabers, already drained from the star destroyer incident they openly strain at the effort. Fai'rel re-engages his lightsaber and strikes at the three.



Fai'rel: (absorbing force lightening via his palm while striking at doneeta) the sith are too cowardly to face me themselves!



Sha'ala delievers a string of lightsaber attacks amidst the attack of the clone. Asajj and Nikkos attempt to advance upon the clone, whom increases his stream of lightening. one stream connects with doneeta while she's in mid spin in a duel with fai'rel.



Doneeta catches the business end of Fai'rel's lightsaber and her head falls to the ground. Ventress and Tyris attempt to ward off both C'baoth and Fai'rel.

Fai'rel descends upon the dark jedi twirling his lightsaber in anticpation of the death blow. Asajj and Nikkos struggle to stand while taking direct hits of the dark force lightening.


Seeing the open road of attack, Dilbun aims his Laser pistol at the dark jedi and opens fire. Fai'rel takes the full blast of the disintegration barrel and materializes into nothing. suddenly C'baoth takes a hit from the stun pulse as fired by Kligson, the clone falls to the ground, the lightening attack ceases. the entire surviving group turns their weapons towards Kligson as he presses a button that closes the door between himself and the group.

LAAT-traveling above the canopy of Wayland



J'mee Fett: (holding hand to head) Black Opps are requested back on Coruscant within the hour.

Tractha: understood.

Asajj Ventress: how'd a simple being triumph where we could not!

Dilbun Vont: maybe you should hit the fringe and try carving up a rep before you try swinging yur lazorsword wit the big boys..eh?

Asajj Ventress: they will never find your body..



Sora Bulq: enough! Ventress if you speak another word in my presence it will be your last.

Dilbun Vont: so what's the big kriffing deal bout cappin that Bpfhasshi clown? what was he the jedi's big guns before he went darko?

The Dark Jedi assembled take a moment before to gather their thoughts before speaking.

Nikkos Tyris:  for starters he was trained by the real version of that clone back there, C'baoth may have been a real hardhead. but he was one of the best, council material if not for his...Attitude.

Dilbun Vont: you've gotta be kiddin me..only somebody like Aurra Sing could take down a akk dog like that? right.

Sora Bulq: she could try, but he'd see it coming. he was also on-par with the count.

Dilbun Vont: gee you guys enjoy layin it on thick don'tcha?

Nikkos Tyris: do not doubt us, i share Ventress's dishonor and disgrace in failing to rid our masters of Fai'rel. as do Skorr and Bulq. The Bpfahsshi was no ordinary dark jedi Vont, years ago he was a potential Sith Lord inplace of the count.

Dilbun Vont: Kriff me, so that's why he had an axe to grind with em.


In deep space, Kligson begins construction of Droid World.

On Bakura, the Dark Jedi Lieutenants of Dooku bow before Darth Tyrannus.

On Wayland, Joruus C'baoth watches the wrecked star destroyer burn from his fortress.

On Coruscant, Tarkin, Gauer and Tractha place J'mee Fett back into stasis.

Coruscant- Twenty Years Before the Battle of Yavin IV



Dilbun Vont: What the kriff was the idea putting me in-charge of that mess augie?

Palpatine: for starters vont, i'd like to congratulate you upon your success in this fragile scheme you've delivered us from. secondly...

Suddenly Vont is gasping for air, Palpatine approaches the flailing victim in the guise of his true self.

Darth Sidious: your continual attempts to strike fear into me are quite rude Dilbun. you of all people know exactly how i dislike being talked down to by inferior beings, and you know full well what treatment it arouses.

Dilbun Vont: (choking) juu..st dooo it!

Darth Sidious (releasing all hold over Dilbun) thanks to you my plans remain intact. my apprentice firmly placed in check, his acolytes at each others throats and completely ashamed of having played second fiddle to one such as yourself.

Dilbun Vont: why me? you're the kriffing dark lord of the sith!

Darth Sidious: if we had devised any sort of plan regarding Fai'rel's elimination. via the force he'd have already known our plan, as you've heard the fates of the force; especially the dark times were currently bringing about are too much for the jedi to view entirely in glimpse. so they avoid it all together, but the dark jedi can see what their brethren shy away from.



Dilbun Vont: ok he'd have seen it all coming, but still why'd it haft to be me? Gauer coulda led this mess!

Darth Sidious: Gauer isn't insane, his mind works along sane lines. yours however is practically unreadable due to its inconstant hyper-manic rhythm. understand what i'm telling vont, force-sensitives cannot read your mind.

Dilbun Vont: tyris knew i was doubting myself back on wayland! what other flavors of nerf fodder you got augie?


Darth Sidious: (smacking vont with the hilt of his lightsaber) i hope you you grasp the level of self-control you require me to practice vont. you really are a great tool, i probably owe my political career to our interactions.

Dilbun Vont: that's rich.

Darth Sidious: vague impressions can be gleaned and that is all, i assure you . Fai'rel would have dodged the blaster fire of any hired gun in the galaxy, save a handful of psychotics such as yourself. normal minds have so many triggers in them against abnormal actions that they can be heard coming from miles away. your urges, actions and desire to commit atrocity is so second nature to you that you simply can commit murder as another person reacts to a itch. now i believe you understand your worth to me dilbun.



Dilbun: (narration) crystal clear, my fee just tripled.

Palpatine: your next assignment requires no monetary advancement as of yet, the guidelines are simple. do what you do you best dilbun, enjoy yourself. the bigger the body count, the greater the distraction, high profile victims are in order. perhaps a string of them if need be, a trail is really what i require of you.




Dilbun Vont will Return
next episode: "The Lekku Loper"