Author Topic: Old People can be...  (Read 1108 times)

Offline SiteC

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Old People can be...
« on: April 25, 2004, 07:54 PM »
..extremely vicious.

As some of you may or may not know I am a dietary aide at a nursing home (which means I work in the kitchen), and we have to serve in the dining room there, well, over the past few days, some of these people have gone on a real mean streak lately.

One lady screamed at the cook so bad lastnight she literally lost her voice screaming, all because her doctor put her on a puree diet and she doesnt want to eat it, so she took it out on the cook and said we 'abuse her' and 'starve her to death.'  But it doesnt end there.

I NEVER in my life expected to hear what I heard tonight from two women who were arguing at the table.

Woman 1:  OH SHUT UP ALREADY!
Woman 2:  I don't have to!
W1:  Just shut the hell up, bitch!  Noone wants to hear you!
W2:  Why are you so mean?
W1:  I'm not mean, your just a dumb bitch!
W2:  (Mumbling)
W1: You know what?  Somebody needs to take you out into the woods, and shoot you, and drive away.

At that point I had to intervein and break the fight up between these two women (who are in their late 80s no less).  

I never in a million years would have thought that the elderly could be so hateful to eachother...and to us!  

Vicious!!

Edit:  Damnit.. I hit the wrong forum.  So one of you kind mods can please move this??  

It must be that senile dimentia in the air...
« Last Edit: April 25, 2004, 07:56 PM by SiteC »

Offline Morgbug

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Re: Old People can be...
« Reply #1 on: April 25, 2004, 11:34 PM »
That definitely sucks, especially since you have to endure it.  But people are people, regardless of age.  Some are bitter and mean and that's really all there is to it.  In some cases, growing old can foster that bitterness, which is unfortunate, but for some people, being abandoned to a home isn't really all that wonderful an experience.  Again, nothing that's your fault, but amazing to see people do that to their kin.
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Online Rob

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Re: Old People can be...
« Reply #2 on: April 26, 2004, 01:32 AM »
I was visiting my great grandmother in her nursing home a few years ago before she passed away...

And there was this senile woman out in the hallway yelling at all the nurses and workers that someone had broken into her apartment and stolen all of her belongings.  She was upset and yelled that she worked hard all her life and they could just come in and take whatever they please whenever they want and how they were no good criminals and on and on and on...

Little did she know that it was just laundry day - they'd taken her dirty laundry.

Offline sp00ky

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Re: Old People can be...
« Reply #3 on: April 26, 2004, 10:19 AM »
Old people can be.......  a wealth of knowledge, wonderful to be around, and a source of inspiration.

People can be mean, rude, nasty, old or not.

Basically what Morgbug said... ;)

Here are two examples:

Saturday afternoon, I am the local McD's.  Took the kids there while waiting for Nadine to get her hair done.  Place is packed, and I finally find a seat, buts its only a table for two.  I walk over and notice a man sitting at a table for 4 all by himself.

I start to sit the kids down, but realize this isn't going to work, and I nicely ask if it would be OK for us to trade tables so I can sit with my kids.

"No... I was here first, tough luck for you"  

"I understand sir, but since you are all alone and I have these two little kids to take care of, it would be a great help if we could trade"

"No" quite smugly he says.

Another time and place I would have been dragging this man out of his chair by the neck, but I have worked out a lot of anger issues since then... ;)

So I proceeded to help my kids the best I could until someone else came up and offtered the table they were leaving.

Now, this man was "older" he smelled, and looked like he wore the same clothes everyday.  I guess I knew in my heart when I first saw him he wouldn't move, but reminded myself not to be close minded and judge others by their appearance... didn't work this time.

Another story... I spent a great deal of time with a lady helping her with some technical issues (I work support for a wireless company) she was qite elderly and for some reasons her son set her up with wireless internet services.  These can be very complex to troubleshoot, and looking in her file she had numerous calls for help, but at the beginning most of these her son would call in. I spent some time helping her, got it all sorted out, she thanked me and asked how she could call me back if there was trouble again.  I gave her my first name, and tech ID, with some trepidation as I really can't be her personal helper each time she can't figure out how to open an e-mail...

A few weeks later I get a package addressed to Scott ID 4069 care of the company I work for.  When I open it up there was a gift certificate for a local restaurant, and a nice letter from her.  The letter basically thanked me for all the help, and she was sorry to be a bother.  It went on to say that she usually asked her son for help but he recently was killed in a motorcycle crash.  She said talking to me reminded her of him.

I keep the letter at my desk as a reminder that sometimes there is a another story you don't know about.

Scott
« Last Edit: April 26, 2004, 10:23 AM by sp00ky »
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Offline Deanpaul

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Re: Old People can be...
« Reply #4 on: April 26, 2004, 08:18 PM »
Old people can be.......  a wealth of knowledge, wonderful to be around, and a source of inspiration.

People can be mean, rude, nasty, old or not.

Basically what Morgbug said... ;)

Here are two examples:

Saturday afternoon, I am the local McD's.  Took the kids there while waiting for Nadine to get her hair done.  Place is packed, and I finally find a seat, buts its only a table for two.  I walk over and notice a man sitting at a table for 4 all by himself.

I start to sit the kids down, but realize this isn't going to work, and I nicely ask if it would be OK for us to trade tables so I can sit with my kids.

"No... I was here first, tough luck for you"  

"I understand sir, but since you are all alone and I have these two little kids to take care of, it would be a great help if we could trade"

"No" quite smugly he says.

Another time and place I would have been dragging this man out of his chair by the neck, but I have worked out a lot of anger issues since then... ;)

So I proceeded to help my kids the best I could until someone else came up and offtered the table they were leaving.

Now, this man was "older" he smelled, and looked like he wore the same clothes everyday.  I guess I knew in my heart when I first saw him he wouldn't move, but reminded myself not to be close minded and judge others by their appearance... didn't work this time.

Another story... I spent a great deal of time with a lady helping her with some technical issues (I work support for a wireless company) she was qite elderly and for some reasons her son set her up with wireless internet services.  These can be very complex to troubleshoot, and looking in her file she had numerous calls for help, but at the beginning most of these her son would call in. I spent some time helping her, got it all sorted out, she thanked me and asked how she could call me back if there was trouble again.  I gave her my first name, and tech ID, with some trepidation as I really can't be her personal helper each time she can't figure out how to open an e-mail...

A few weeks later I get a package addressed to Scott ID 4069 care of the company I work for.  When I open it up there was a gift certificate for a local restaurant, and a nice letter from her.  The letter basically thanked me for all the help, and she was sorry to be a bother.  It went on to say that she usually asked her son for help but he recently was killed in a motorcycle crash.  She said talking to me reminded her of him.

I keep the letter at my desk as a reminder that sometimes there is a another story you don't know about.

Scott

Thanks, Scott.

Those are both great stories.
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Offline JediMAC

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Re: Old People can be...
« Reply #5 on: April 26, 2004, 08:36 PM »
But people are people, regardless of age.  Some are bitter and mean and that's really all there is to it.  In some cases, growing old can foster that bitterness, which is unfortunate, but for some people, being abandoned to a home isn't really all that wonderful an experience.

Pretty much exactly what I was going to say.  I think what makes it more noticeable when "older folks" get cranky, is that we generally think that "older folks" should all be the stereotypical sweet, kind, gentle grandparent-like people, and it's a little surprising, and very eye-catching, when they're not.

I know that my grandpa has become much more irritable, bitter, short-tempered, etc. in recent years, and it's really a sad thing to watch happen.  He snaps at my grandma pretty good now (just verbally), whereas I don't ever recall him doing that in years past.  I think it had a little something to do with them moving out of their own house, and into a retirement community a couple years ago (they're both in their late 80's).

I know it was very difficult for them to give up a lot of their freedoms and their independence, and for my grandpa having to give up his beloved garage, along with his workbench and his lifelong collection of tools and other various mechanical gadgets.  So I can understand where some of his bitterness has come from, and can sympathize with him.  Still sucks to watch him yell at my grandma sometimes though...   :-\

But Scott makes some great points too, in that the elderly are a wealth of incredible, and often untapped, knowledge.  You'd be amazed at how much history and knowledge is stuffed in my grandma's noggin.  She talks to my wife for hours on end about that kind of stuff, and we'll often pick her brain for stories about what it was like to live through important historical events in the past.

Cranky and irritable or not, do your best to respect "old people", and hopefully do what you can, even if it's just a smile or "hello", to make their lives a little happier.  They may not show it, but they'll definitely appreciate it...   :)
« Last Edit: April 26, 2004, 08:36 PM by JediMAC »

Offline Famine

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Re: Old People can be...
« Reply #6 on: April 26, 2004, 11:42 PM »
Cranky and irritable or not, do your best to respect "old people", and hopefully do what you can, even if it's just a smile or "hello", to make their lives a little happier.  They may not show it, but they'll definitely appreciate it...   :)

So you're saying if I smile and say hello to Morgbug more often, he wont be so grumpy?

:) Hello Morgbug.


Kevin ;)
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Offline Morgbug

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Re: Old People can be...
« Reply #7 on: April 26, 2004, 11:45 PM »
Hi Kevin.  

3:00 ;D
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Offline Famine

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Re: Old People can be...
« Reply #8 on: April 26, 2004, 11:47 PM »
The picture kept, will remind me...

Offline SiteC

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Re: Old People can be...
« Reply #9 on: April 27, 2004, 02:15 PM »
Well, lastnight was crab cake night, and it was just crab meat breaded and fried.

One of the old ladies was SMASHING hers against the table, and she calls me over,

"Dear, can you get the shell and legs off my crab?"  

At this point I had to explain to her that there was no shell and legs on her flat round crab pattie...it didn't sink in, so whatever.  The same woman also puts pepper on her food and then tells us ants have taken over her plate...I just thought it was kind of funny that she wanted the shell removed from a crab cake...and it didnt even look like a crab, at all...

Sometimes I don't know...

Offline sp00ky

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Re: Old People can be...
« Reply #10 on: April 27, 2004, 10:44 PM »
Do you think maybe you are in the wrong line of work?
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Offline inadvertent imitation

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Re: Old People can be...
« Reply #11 on: April 28, 2004, 02:59 AM »
I'd get a different job. Going through that stuff daily, well, I'd have put Krazy glue in their Fixodent.

But that's just me.
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Offline SiteC

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Re: Old People can be...
« Reply #12 on: April 28, 2004, 03:42 AM »
Do you think maybe you are in the wrong line of work?

Probably, yes, but at the moment its all I have.  The economy around here sucks, and I make more where I am at than I would at a retail joint around here.  

Then again its not really that hard of a job, unless its a day where I get stuck in the dishroom, which is non-stop bust your ass work.  Its just the fact that alot of the people are REALLY demanding when it comes to serving them, it really works your nerves over..and to complicate matters, the nurses and aides don't really do anything to help you out, they sit and watch you, which is BS.

We just had the state health dept. come in lastweek and do an inspection.  I have no idea how that home passed, they have to be paying some higher up off.  

I don't know though.  

Maybe someday I will have a job that doesnt kill me mentally and physically...but for the moment I get to stay with the crazies.





Offline Jediknight760071

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Re: Old People can be...
« Reply #13 on: April 28, 2004, 08:13 PM »
Hmmm...I've got a grandma...she's nice...and she used to do a lot of traveling and such...

But then...about 20 years ago...she just changed. I heard a story about a tim she had to go to driving school (she was a DP for awhile and didn't get to learn until then) but when my parents came to take her...she freaked out. She refused to go until they ate..even though she'd be 2+ hours late. When they said they couldn't she said that she would not go with them and proceeded to call a taxi to take her.  That really freaked my mom out, cause my Grandma never acted like that, but then my Uncle Chet came in and took care of the situation...

I Guess things just set people off.

BTW...Since then, my grandma got her license...but her personal trainer died in an accident, and my grandma won't drive on anything but local roads. Wierd stuff.