You'd be ordered to make every thread an "official" one while locking all other discussions, post in threads even if you don't have anything to add but "very nice!", edit people's remarks without notification of why/when, and never deal with "problem" members unless they criticize the site or its staff?
that's not satire, it's honesty... Or were you really going for satire?
One of what I thought was my funnier remarks was when someone said one of the "better mods" should come in and do something within a thread, and I said that "Apokolips doesn't have that power anymore".
I don't think anyone saw it, or they didn't get it... Or I thought it was funnier than it was.