Author Topic: DARK ILLUSIONS Photonovel (Complete)  (Read 83488 times)

Offline CHEWIE

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Re: DARK ILLUSIONS - Photonovel
« Reply #75 on: February 17, 2006, 11:27 AM »
I am looking forward to another update too.  But take your time SA, these take forever to make.

Would you consider showing one chapter at a time?

 :P

Offline S_A_Longhorn

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Re: DARK ILLUSIONS - Photonovel
« Reply #76 on: February 17, 2006, 11:51 AM »
I would consider only updating one chapter at a time, except some chapters are slower than others. 

Your RYKROF updates emcompass a lot of different stories in each chapter.  I tend to dedicate each chapter to a specific storyline.  Which is why I usually update 3 chapters at a time to move the story along.

Should have the next update complete by today, hopefully.  ;)
"WE HAVE NOTHING TO HIDE.  TODD WILL COOPERATE."
-Sarah Palin to Charlie Gibson, a week before her husband, Todd Palin, refused to cooperate

Offline Clone Commander

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Re: DARK ILLUSIONS - Photonovel
« Reply #77 on: February 17, 2006, 12:28 PM »
Woohooo!!!
Nice work on your photonovels.
I wonder what the update will be like.
Clone Commander Appo.

Offline S_A_Longhorn

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Re: DARK ILLUSIONS - Photonovel
« Reply #78 on: February 20, 2006, 12:33 PM »
OK, after much delay, here are the next three chapters (22, 23, and 24) of DARK ILLUSIONS.

Enjoy!  8)

"WE HAVE NOTHING TO HIDE.  TODD WILL COOPERATE."
-Sarah Palin to Charlie Gibson, a week before her husband, Todd Palin, refused to cooperate

Offline S_A_Longhorn

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Re: DARK ILLUSIONS - Photonovel
« Reply #79 on: February 20, 2006, 12:35 PM »
DARK ILLUSIONS

Chapter 22




Following an emergency session of the Galactic Senate, Senator Bail Organa waits for Padme Amidala outside the Chancellor’s office.



Captain Antilles:   Is it true the Security measured passed, your Majesty?
Bail Organa:   Yes, that’s true, and without much resistance.  The Chancellor was very successful in gathering support for the measure. 





Bail Organa:   Once the news spread about two Royal Guards being murdered and dumped at an abandoned warehouse,  Senators quickly changed their minds about the need for a Clone Security force.  He certainly didn’t need our support, so I’m confused why he wants to meet with Senator Amidala and me so quickly.
Captain Antilles:   Perhaps he just wants to thank you for your support.





Bail Organa:   Let’s hope so.  I am in no mood to discuss another amendment, which will only result in the Chancellor gaining more power.  Prepare the Tantive IV for our trip home.  We’ll leave as soon as this meeting concludes.
Captain Antilles:   Yes, your Highness.





Bail Organa:   Pleasure to see you again, Senator Amidala.
Padme Amidala:   And you as well, Bail.  I bumped into Senator Tills on my way here.  When I mentioned that we were meeting with the Chancellor, he insisted on joining us.




Padme Amidala:   He is convinced we will try to persuade the Chancellor to rescind the Security measure, aren’t you, Meena?   





Meena Tills:   Please don’t misunderstand me.  I am just as concerned as you are about the power the Chancellor is gathering.  However, this new Security Act will ensure the safety of Coruscant and the Senate.






Meena Tills:   I personally have witnessed the consequences of this war.  Mon Calamari is still in ruin following the attack by the Separatists.  We must protect the Capital at all costs.
Bail Organa:   I agree, Senator, but Palpatine has been given the final word on how this new Clone division is used.  In short, he controls the only garrison on Coruscant.  We must be certain that he does not abuse that power. 






Bail Organa:   Hopefully, he will give us some insight to his plans during this meeting.  My only hope is that he involves the Jedi in some way with this new Clone army.







Meena Tills:   That’s a good idea.  Perhaps he will.  However, this Security Force should only be seen as a positive thing for the Republic.
Bail Organa:   Possibly, but what Jedi would sacrifice fighting in the War to remain here on Coruscant fulltime?
Padme Amidala:   (whispering)   I know of one………







Scarlet:   Halt!  Show your identification.






Bail Organa:   Is that really necessary?    We’ve never been asked to show identification before. I am Senator Bail Organa of Alderaan, and this is Senators Amidala and Tills.






Scarlet:   Your names appear on the list of guests.  You may proceed.
Bail Organa:   Thank you.  I can understand your concern.






Mas Amedda:   Welcome Senators.  We’ve been expecting you.
Bail Organa:   Senators Amidala and Tills have accompanied me today, Mas.





Mas Amedda:   Yes, of course.  The Chancellor welcomes any opportunity to speak with a Senator on a one-to-one basis.





Padme Amidala:   Where is the Chancellor now?





Mas Amedda:   He is speaking to Governor Tarkin.





Mas Amedda:   But he wanted to begin the meeting as soon as you arrived, Senators.  Here he comes now.





Chancellor Palpatine:   Please excuse my rudeness for not greeting you myself.  It seems everyone is excited about the new Galactic Security.  Welcome, Senators Organa and Amidala.





Bail Organa:   Please allow me introduce Senator Meena Tills of Mon Calamari.   
Chancellor Palpatine:   Yes, of course.  I was saddened to hear about the devastation on to your home world, Senator.
Meena Tills:   Thank you, Chancellor.  We are on our way to a full recovery, thanks to the Republic and Jedi Master Fisto.






Chancellor Palpatine:   Well then, let us begin.  Thank you for joining me today, to celebrate the passing of the Galactic Security measure.  Coruscant will be forever thankful for our work today, Senators.





Chancellor Palpatine:   Due to our hard work and dedication, Coruscant will soon be protected by specially trained Clones.  These two new divisions will be the best troops we’ve ever had.






Chancellor Palpatine:   However, we must not forget the terrible murders of the  two Royal Guards.  Let us now look upon their tragic loss as the beginning of a more safe and secure Republic.





Padme Amidala:   Does that include a Peace Summit with the leaders of the Confederacy, Chancellor?   




Chancellor Palpatine:   I hope so, Senator.  You must know that I personally want nothing more than a peaceful end to this War.   






Chancellor Palpatine:   But it may prove difficult to convince the Separatist leaders to come to Coruscant……Security Force or not.
Governor Tarkin:   I volunteer my home world of Eriadu to hold the Peace Summit.  We have learned from our previous mistakes during the Valorum administration, I assure you.






Meena Tills:   We must hold the Summit here on Coruscant, for that is the reason many Senators voted for the Security measure.  Eriadu is in the Outer Rim, Governor, and not a part of the Republic.





Chancellor Palpatine:   Senator Tills is right.  The Summit, if one were to be held, must be on Coruscant.  That is one point that I will not concede.  But first, we must have the Security force in place before any Summit can be organized.







Bail Organa:   How long will that take?  Clones require ten years to mature.






Chancellor Palpatine:   I have good news, Senators!  I have just received confirmation from Kamino about a new batch of Clones that were trained for this exact purpose.  They were originally created to protect Kamino from any invasion.  However, they have agreed to donate these troops to the Republic.  They should arrive in a few days.
Bail Organa:   And what about the Jedi?  Will they be involved with this new Clone battalion?






Chancellor Palpatine:   It did occur to me during the debates that one Jedi should work closely with the new troops.   Perhaps the Council can recommend someone.





Chancellor Palpatine:   As soon as the troops arrive, I will speak with the Jedi Order regarding this matter.   Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must begin preparing for my  public announcement.






Chancellor Palpatine:   I greatly appreciate your time and your support, Senators.  Only together can we restore peace to the Republic.





Governor Tarkin:   I have urgent matters I must attend to on Eriadu.  If you’ll excuse me, gentlemen…M’Lady.






Bail Organa:   Can you believe the coincidence that Kamino just happen to have these Clones so readily available?
Padme Amidala:   No.  Why would Kamino need their own security force if the Republic is already protecting Kamino?
Meena Tills:   I agree.  There is something not right about this.






Meena Tills:   Nevertheless, we have Palpatine’s assurances that he will pursue a diplomatic solution.  And that he will consult with the Jedi Order.





Bail Organa:   We have at least that much.  His motives seem well-intended, but everything is happening so quickly.  I look forward to his speech and the reaction from the Republic.






Padme Amidala:   The reaction will be nothing but positive.  He is even more popular with the people than he is in the Senate.  But we should discuss these matters elsewhere.





Padme Amidala:   We never know who could be listening……

"WE HAVE NOTHING TO HIDE.  TODD WILL COOPERATE."
-Sarah Palin to Charlie Gibson, a week before her husband, Todd Palin, refused to cooperate

Offline S_A_Longhorn

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Re: DARK ILLUSIONS - Photonovel
« Reply #80 on: February 20, 2006, 12:36 PM »
DARK ILLUSIONS

Chapter 23




Jedi Master Mace Windu receives an urgent message for a confidential meeting on a rooftop in the nightclub section of Coruscant.



 





Shade:   ……you’re late……






Mace Windu:   How long have you been here?  This is a very public place.






Shade:   ……no worry……no one looks up……down here……





Mace Windu:   Very well.  Please tell me that your investigation didn’t have anything to do with the murders of the Royal Guards. 





Shade:   They were traitors to the Republic!!!





Shade:   They betrayed their oath……to protect the Republic……they deserved to be executed……





Mace Windu:   No one deserves to die, including traitors.






Shade:   ……really?……there are a lot of people……that would disagree with you, Jedi…… 





Shade:   ……besides……the information I found……may prove to be more valuable……than their lives……






Mace Windu:   What did you find?
Shade:   ……not what……but where…… 






Shade:   ……a message sent to an unidentified warrior……to go to a planet in the Outer Rim…… and meet someone there……
Mace Windu:   Meet who?  It could be Sidious or even Count Dooku.





Shade:   ……doesn’t say……but their data pad does have……the coordinates to the Outer Rim planet……






Mace Windu:   Which planet in the Outer Rim?







Shade:   ……too difficult to tell……the coordinates are well outside the Republic’s maps……





Mace Windu:   Do you have any information on the warrior?  Another bounty hunter?






Shade:   ……no information about the warrior either……






Shade:   ……but I will travel to the Outer Rim……and find this “warrior”……







Mace Windu:   Do not, I repeat, DO NOT engage the enemy.  Wait until we arrive.  Is that clear?








Shade:   ……unless……it is absolutely necessary……you have my word, Jedi……keep the data pad……







Mace Windu:   ………






Mace Windu:   Gone……





« Last Edit: February 20, 2006, 04:01 PM by S_A_Longhorn »
"WE HAVE NOTHING TO HIDE.  TODD WILL COOPERATE."
-Sarah Palin to Charlie Gibson, a week before her husband, Todd Palin, refused to cooperate

Offline S_A_Longhorn

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Re: DARK ILLUSIONS - Photonovel
« Reply #81 on: February 20, 2006, 12:38 PM »
DARK ILLUSIONS

Chapter 24




Following the memorial for Adi Gallia, Jedi Master Saesee Tiin and Commander EZ are ordered to begin searching for the Separatist Leaders in the Outer Rim.



Epsilon:   Did you hear the rumor?  Grievous is supposed to be hiding out here in the Outer Rim.  And we were the battalion chosen to find him!




Zeta:   Really?  In that case, care to make a friendly wager?  First one to find Grievous, wins…and loser does the winner’s cleaning detail for a month.
Epsilon:   You’re on!





Commander EZ:   Pipe down, troopers!  We’re about to land.  Gather your weapons.
Epsilon & Zeta:   Yes, sir.






Commander EZ:   This is a reconnaissance mission, not a war party.  And any more mention of gambling will be reported directly to the Chancellor’s office, is that understood?
Epsilon & Zeta:   YES, SIR!!!






Commander EZ:   Epsilon and Zeta have volunteered themselves to begin the search. I will remain on board and monitor their progress. 
Saesee Tiin:   No.






Commander EZ:   But General, scouting is a job for troopers…not Commanders.  I suggest we remain with the Gunship in case---
Saesee Tiin:   No.






Commander EZ:   But what if ---
Saesee Tiin:   No!  We will all participate in this mission, Commander.





Eta:   General Tiin, we are approaching the landing zone.  Scanners have picked up a large life-form, moving East. 






Saesee Tiin:   Pay no mind to it.  We are looking for small pathetic, life-forms, such as Nemodians.  Begin the landing process.
Eta:   Yes, General.





Saesee Tiin:   Are your men ready, Commander? 
Commander EZ:   Yes, General.  We have a full squad of nine.





Commander EZ:   Impossible Jedi. 
Theta:   Yes, sir.





TTTTHHHHUUUUDDDD!
Theta:   Hey……
Commander EZ:   Watch it……you call that a landing??  Pilot, I shall report you to the---




Iota:   That wasn’t us, sir.  We were already on the ground when that tremor occurred. 
Commander EZ:   Are we under attack?!





Iota:   No, sir.  The vibration resonated from the ground.  Scanners indicate the shockwave came from the large life-form.
Commander EZ:   Then, this mission just got more complicated.  Keep an eye on the life-form, pilot.  Let’s go, trooper.
Theta:   Yes, sir.






Kappa:   All clear, sir.  No sign of any droids.






Theta:   What planet is this? 
Commander EZ:   Don’t worry about that, trooper.  The sun is beginning to rise.





Saesee Tiin:   Then we should move quickly.






TTTTTHHHHUUUUUUDDDDDD!!!
Commander EZ:   Another tremor……hold on……..





Epsilon:   What is that thing?!
Commander EZ:   That shockwave was stronger than the previous one.
Saesee Tiin:   The creature is just testing us.  Ignore it, and it will ignore you.  Keep your focus on the task at hand.






Commander EZ:   Pilots, remain with the Avenger.  We’ll be in contact.
Iota:   Yes, sir.






Commander EZ:   You heard the General.  Let’s move out, troopers.





Eta:   Sir, scanners have picked up something……this direction.






Theta:   I have it on my scope……we have confirmation……a battle droid.
Commander EZ:   Good, our first catch of the day.






Theta:   There’s only one.  No wonder the Avenger didn’t see him, sir.






Commander EZ:   The Droid Army must have just arrived.  They’re setting up their radar. 





Commander EZ:   Trooper, call for reinforcements.
Theta:   Yes, sir.
Saesee Tiin:   No.  Hold your position.






Saesee Tiin:   Let’s follow him.










Saesee Tiin:   A single battle droid couldn’t have wandered far from the other droids.
Commander EZ:   You’re right, General.  More droids straight ahead.






Commander EZ:   They’re setting up another radar station.  Only a few droids though.






Commander EZ:   Their base should be nearby---
(A tree branch snaps!)






Battle Droid:   Intruders!  Open fire!





Commander EZ:   Troopers…Fire!!!  Fire!!!  Fire!!!







Theta:   They’re down, sir!






Eta:   Not all of them……destroyer droid!






Commander EZ:   Let the Jedi handle that one.







CRASH!






Commander EZ:   General, there is no doubt that the Separatists are here.  We must call for reinforcements.








Saesee Tiin:   Not yet, Commander.  We still don’t know why they’re here, or how big their droid army is.  Perhaps this will give us a clue.







Saesee Tiin:   This is no radar station……it’s a turret.  Specifically, an anti-aircraft turret.  The Separatists are building a base.







Saesee Tiin:   Commander, have your men destroy these turrets.  We must find the base quickly.
Commander EZ:   Yes, General.






TTTTTHHHHHHUUUUUUUDDDDDD!!!!!





Theta:   What about that creature, sir?
Commander EZ:   We may have to do some exterminating.  But first, tell Central Command to have a battalion ready to deploy.  Have them monitor the system for arriving Trade Federation ships. 




Commander EZ:   Tell them we found something……in the Oner System.




To be continued…



Special thanx to STRIKEG @ RS for the additional effects added to picture 24-34b, where the Clones fire back.  Great work, STRIKEG!  Check out his website,  FettsBest.com .
« Last Edit: February 21, 2006, 05:44 PM by S_A_Longhorn »
"WE HAVE NOTHING TO HIDE.  TODD WILL COOPERATE."
-Sarah Palin to Charlie Gibson, a week before her husband, Todd Palin, refused to cooperate

Offline Smartypants1635

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Re: DARK ILLUSIONS - Photonovel
« Reply #82 on: February 20, 2006, 12:54 PM »
Good job man thats awsome can't wait to see waht that creature is. ANd EZ is an idiot.

Offline CHEWIE

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Re: DARK ILLUSIONS - Photonovel
« Reply #83 on: February 20, 2006, 03:23 PM »
Cool to see another update SA.  These were interesting for sure.  There were a couple questions I had and some things I really liked.

First off, one typo I think I noticed.  In one of the frames where Windu is speaking with Shade, the word "to" should read "too" where he says "to difficult to tell."  Also when they are talking about some creature that is making the ground shake they refer to it as "the" creature in the first frame where it is mentioned, like the whole crew already know what it is... maybe referring to it as "a" creature or lifeform here would be better, but maybe not.

Also, to me I am surprised to see Shade and another clone with Saesee arguing so much with the Jedi... just seems a little out of line.  Shade just seems kind of bossy to me.  I think they follow orders without question from the Jedi until Order 66.  But I guess there could be a few that think more independently than others.  I was also surprised to see Saesee calling the Nemoidians pathetic lifeforms, I thought he would have a bit more respect than that but perhaps not, it's a trying war.

But there were some things I really like about this too, especially the first chapter in Palpatine's office.  You do a great job on those sets, it really feels like you are watching a deleted scene or something from the Clone Wars here.  Great work on the set and the dialogue is great.  I like Bail's role here a lot and Padme in the robes to hide her belly are a good touch.

I also liked the setting where they land on the planet.  It kind of has a Felucia feel to it.  I really like how you use Battle Droids in these, do you have a few more for a shot of more than one at a time?  Just would be cool to see more than one of them at once as they are the grunts in the droid army.

Good job here, I'm looking forward to seeing how this one goes.  How many more chapters are going to be in it?

 :P

Offline S_A_Longhorn

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Re: DARK ILLUSIONS - Photonovel
« Reply #84 on: February 20, 2006, 04:28 PM »
Thanx for the feedback, guys!  Always appreciated and insightful.

SMARTY - Glad you enjoyed the latest chapters.  Cmdr. EZ got some interesting comments after chapter 15, so I am glad his character is coming off as unlikable, that was the point.  He was a fun character to create.  I'll explain his name later.  The creature will be revealed, but not too soon.  ;)

CHEWIE - Always good to read your comments. 

I corrected the typo.   :-[  Grammer was never my strong point, which is why the dialogue always takes so long.  As for "the creature" or "life-form", I re-read the dialogue and left it as is.  Th Clones refer to it as a "life-form" until Saesee Tiin refers to it as "the creature".  From there, the Clones refer to it as "the creature" since the "wise" Jedi called it that. 

The Clones personality is something I am taking some freedoms with.  The basic grunt Clones follow orders without question.  But the Commanders all have their own personalities.  Cmdr EZ was in chapter 15, when he got into a "ruckus' with Bacara.  He is known as "anal", as FLACKS described him.  Saesee Tiin is a very different Jedi compared to Yoda, Mace, Obi-Wan, or Shaak Ti.  He is a quiet, no-nonsense type of guy, which easily conflicts with EZ's "commander" personality.  But EZ does follow Tiin's orders, but he does like to hear himself talk "commander".

As for Shade, he is a very different Clone.  I see him as more like Jango or Boba Fett, with a personality similar to a bounty hunter.  He is extremely loyal to the Rebublic, than to the Jedi.  He is working with Mace, but he knows the importance of his mission.  His story will get more exciting in the upcoming chapters.

Thanx for the feedback on the Palpatine chapter.  The political chapters are fun to write, but probably a little boring.

The Oner system took me the longest to create.  Without digital effects, I really have to use household stuff to create a new environment.  I only have one battle droid ( :-[), but if anybody wants to send me some more, by all means.... :)

And to answer your last question about how long is the rest of the story, I have 6 more chapters until the end of Act II.  There will be one more Act and perhaps an Epilogue.  Still got a while to go.  :P
"WE HAVE NOTHING TO HIDE.  TODD WILL COOPERATE."
-Sarah Palin to Charlie Gibson, a week before her husband, Todd Palin, refused to cooperate

Offline Clone Commander

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Re: DARK ILLUSIONS - Photonovel
« Reply #85 on: February 20, 2006, 05:29 PM »
 ;D Awesome!
I love this story!
Ez seems pretty arrogant and foolish for a clone...
Nice to see master Tinn takin' out some droids.
Another perfect update.
Keep up the exellent work SA Longhorn!
Clone Commander Appo.

Offline Jedi_Assassin

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Re: DARK ILLUSIONS - Photonovel
« Reply #86 on: February 20, 2006, 05:44 PM »
THANK YOU! You are so cool. You want to know why, two reasons.
A) You are the first person here to use the Captain Antillies figure. I have always loved anything Alderaanian.
B) Your photonovels are the best. I love how your incorperate the political and physical parts of the Clone Wars. I don't remember who said it, but about Padme wearing the baggy robes to cover her "bump."
I can't wait for your next instalments, but don't rush. I may be new, but I know that when you spend time on your work, it pays off in the long run. I can't wait to see what happens with Master Tinn and EZ. (Take my advice, if someone imprtant dies in your next chapters, I hope it's EZ. He seems like the person everybody hated in school because he was a tattle tale. Stuff like that.)

Offline CHEWIE

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Re: DARK ILLUSIONS - Photonovel
« Reply #87 on: February 20, 2006, 05:48 PM »
Hey no biggie on a typo, I usually have several on each chapter that I need to fix.  That's what happens when you have Famine or Ryan proof your dialogue.   :D

Makes sense on the lifeform... I wonder what it the heck it is?  Got to be something huge I would think... like something that would make a rancor seem small by comparison.

I love the political scenes actually, they're not boring at all.  If anything I think those are your best chapters.

I'm in the boat of needing more Battle Droids too.  Funny how I can never seem to have enough of those guys.

Great update once again and thanks for continuing the series, seems like the desire to create these has died off by some people.  I think there should be a front page mention again maybe to remind people of the hard work going into these.

 :P

Offline S_A_Longhorn

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Re: DARK ILLUSIONS - Photonovel
« Reply #88 on: February 20, 2006, 06:05 PM »
Clone Commander:  Glad you liked the update, and I was glad to finally post the update after your recent bump.  EZ is a good commander, just doesn't want to his armor dirty.  ;D

Imperial Guard:  Welcome to the boards.  If you like Cpt Antilles, check out my old photonovel, VADER'S QUEST, on the Rebelscum boards.  There is an entire chapter on Antilles and Alderaan.  The robes on Padme work for that reason (to hide the bump) but also b/c there are no Padme Senator figs (and I don't customize).  EZ will have a fun part in the next chapters.

CHEWIE:  I could have bought four battle droids yesterday at the flea market, but 3 of them would have been Episode I droids which do not look as good as ROTS droids.  And I agree with your comments about the interest in Photonovels.  It seems like they have fallen off.  Oh well, as long as everyone enjoys my little story, I will finish it!

Glad to see a reaction from everybody towards certain characters.  Also, as motiviation, it is always good to read what people think or want to happen next!  ;D
"WE HAVE NOTHING TO HIDE.  TODD WILL COOPERATE."
-Sarah Palin to Charlie Gibson, a week before her husband, Todd Palin, refused to cooperate

Offline Jedi_Assassin

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Re: DARK ILLUSIONS - Photonovel
« Reply #89 on: February 20, 2006, 06:09 PM »
Thanks, I'll head over there and check it out. BTW, if you need customs, I could make 'em and mail 'em to you.