Okay. I saw this movie last night. I was going to go see it opening day last week, read the awful reviews, and saw "The Proposal" instead. (I was entertained).
The critics killed Transformers 2, and here's Dressel Rebel's grade:
D +
The movie just about flunked. The one saving grace is that the special effects were pretty cool. That's it, and that's all.
This piece of junk is best described as American Pie meets The Transformers. Sam's parents were a horrific idea. Their stupid jokes (mostly sexual) every 5 minutes were not only not funny, but just about the dumbest attempt at "humor" I've ever seen. The humping dogs, the little robot humping Megan Fox, and Sam's dorm mates sexual jokes every 7 1/2 minutes were stupid, classless and just plain dumb. Also, Megan Fox is not hot. She's siliconed to death, she's carved up her face pretty good, and she's about as attractive as a blow-up doll from an adult store (um, a friend told me).
The storyline was crap. Neither me nor my fiancee understood what was going on or why anybody was doing anything. I had all the Transformers toys as a kid, watched all the cartoons, and liked the Transformers 1 movie. No clue what was going on in this flick whatsoever.
Lastly, the audience. Everytime 5 minutes was up and a stupid sexual innuendo joke was due, there was quite a bit of laughter. Has the standard really dropped so far that people actually find this stuff amusing? I did not crack a smile during this movie. None of it is funny. Looking around TV these days, I understand the days of Leave It To Beaver and I Love Lucy are over (at least for now). But some of the smut and degenerate sexual crap that passes for entertainment or humor on TV and movies these days is just flat out mindblowing. It's sewage. And the audience during Transformers 2 reminded me of the population in the movie "Idiocracy". If you haven't seen it yet, it's worth it.
If you were thinking about seeing Transformers 2 and haven't yet - don't.