Hey, Chewie!!
Love the new story! So I'm going to skip my commentary for #16 (for now) and jump into #17. Here goes...
Love the opening "poster" for the chapter. I suggest you go back and do ones for the old chapters, even though there's no real point. I just love the images!
Did you change the font for your opening crawl? It seems different, maybe I'm misremembering. Still think you should try to scale it back, like the films...but that's the most pathetic nitpick of all time...
By the way, have you ever really established what the overall objectives of the Badoo Corba are? "Terrorists" doesn't feel like the right label at times. Terrorists have goals (like the IRA) or philosophies and beliefs (Al Queda, etc.) which drive them. But what do the Badoo Corba really WANT? They've been around since "Phantom Menace" era in your stories, pre-dating the formation of the Separatists.
I wish we knew more about them and what they wanted, since they are such an important part of your story.
The composite shots are great, as always. Excellent use of the Owen bridge.
Here's a thought - ever consider customizing Rykrof's head a bit? Maybe giving him a full beard? It's nice to see him clean after the Dathomir arc, but maybe it's time for a new look. Maybe greying temples...the war takes its toll!
Nice to see Trigg Fudda's custom ship make an appearance. But I can't help but think the Badoo Corba would need more than a bunch of one man ships. Great shot, but putting in a bigger ship, too, would have been cool. Granted, Hasbro doesn't MAKE any big ships anymore! But maybe a digital image....I dunno...
A total nitpick here...the shot of the shuttle returning with Ryrkrof over Coruscant...the Coruscant skyline looks, well, a little too "drawn". Aren't there more photo-realistic shots of the city you could have used? Hell, if this were anyone else, I wouldn't even mention such an insignificant detail. Maybe I'm just stretching for criticisms...sorry!
Great use of Owen's base, but I think the "stairs" in the middle of the doorway don't really work. "Where do these stairs go?" "They go up!"
Dude, whatever you did to Tylin in the shot with the clones is AMAZING. He really DOES look cold and aloof! Fantastic!!!!
The close-up shot of Tylin is even creepier! But the eyes look just a little...vacant. And, given Tylin's cold demeanor (awesome!!), would he really call him "Rykrof" now. "Commander Enloe" would have been colder, more officious.
But, I guess now is as good a time to say it as any...
I
KNEW Tylin Gere would turn into a bastard! I always hated that guy!! Now he's a proto-Imperial, boot-licking STOOGE for Palpatine!!!! And a chicken hawk, too! How did he get himself promoted to a cushy Admiral's job while Rykrof is out there on the ground, leading troops in battle!!! Tylin must DIE!!!!
I wish Freelo had some lines. I friggin' LOVE that character!!!
WOW! How did you make that Pruneface custom!! It looks great! How did you create the 2nd eye and get rid of the eyepatch? Great work! Also, love the Gand guy, too. Your awesome customs make your universe pulse with life, energy and orginality!!!
Again, I'm going to nitpick the choice of Coruscant shots...but the next shot with the smoke is SWEEEEEEEET! Where is that building image from? Terrific stuff!!
I love the ominous clouds and lightening outside Palps' office! You've done it before, but it looks friggin' great!
Don't like Evo Ani, though. Obviously not your fault, but I think other AOTC figures look better (not by much, though, alas...they never made a perfect AOTC Ani, IMO.)
Also, don't really like the custom of Palpatine. I think his face looks a little overly-customized (overly painted, maybe?) Most of your custom work is seamlessly brilliant and striking in its fantastic detail. But this one, to me, looks, I dunno, like you were trying too hard? It looks too phony or something...
I'm not sure about Rykrof's "priorities" line....It makes it sound like he's saying his priorities are his family. Which makes sense from a personal point of view, but isn't what you should be telling your Commander in Chief. It makes it sound like he's saying, "Hell, I'll do it again, if I want to."
By the way, you do GREAT work with Palptine. I love how he was the one who made Tylin turn on Ryrkrof, then acts all innocent about it. "Admiral Gere...has his concerns." Hee hee!
Cool new mission and cool holo image. Nice work.
I really like your use of poor old Valorum. Well done. Nice to see he's keeping himself in the game and trying to help out.
The Bespin corridor is used well here, but I think you should have put a backdrop in the window. I know you were going for a "dark, mysterious" look, but clearly that window looks like, well, a window...so to have nothing behind it looked just a tad off.
Nice digital work on Heem to fix the neck issues! And the new custom senators are awesome, too. But I think the fur lining on the Tanus senator blends in too much with his actual fur. Would a fur covered creature really wear fur, anyway? I can see those guys being really big anti-fur activists!!
I don't really get the point of Traedon yet. He hasn't really come to life for me yet as a character, I don't have much of a handle on him or see his function. Freelo, on the other hand, is much more well-defined and more fun. I don't really get that Traedon and Rykrof would be particularly close at this point, even with what they went through together, nor do I believe Rykrof would even be allowed to take a civlian with him on a secret mission (not that he's too big on following orders, though!
)
I have another confession - I just don't like the look of Shundi. I think the head is too small for the body (since he comes from a child!) and I never liked the look of the black cloak on top of tan clothing. It looks like you added that stripe down the middle to imply that the black cloak is connected to a black garment under the tunic, but still. Sorry. I know it's too late to do anything about it, and I like the character itself...just not the look.
LOVE the stories that end with "war montages". and this one is another great one! The end with the excavation is another tense beat to end the story on. Very good work.
AMAZING work with the holo's on the war table! Flippin' sweet! And I love the cave and the probe droid shot, esp. with the scanning red light. Your digital skills are truly sublime.
All in all, I really enjoyed the chapter a lot. I like the chapters which are heavy on intrigue and politics and backstabbing (though I know many don't really like those aspects about SW and just prefer adventuring and whatnot).
Still, I think there was a lot of great character stuff here and alot of important developments with the plot.
As I said, I wish we knew more about the goals of the Badoo Corba and more about the organization itself.
Anyway, great work, as always!!! Happy Thanksgiving, all!
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