Got a little more feedback over at Scum from one of the most creative people out there, Lance Quazar -
CHEWIE!!!
This is amazing!! The production values are simply astounding! You have raised the bar YET AGAIN!
So much effort has gone into this beauty that I will again offer a "step by step" analysis as I read it for the second time....
By the way, many have commented on how this blends in with other EU Clone Wars stories. Alas, all I know of CW comes from the cartoon, so I'm not privy to that, but, on its own, it's a great story!
Onto the review....
Off the bat, I love the use of the scroll to bring us up to date on events. It lends the whole thing a very "star wars" feel, obviously. But you use the verb "convincing" twice in the same sentence, which is a minor pet peeve of mine.
The moon of Naboo - I like the use of your moss again!
Obi Wan and the clone - man, I wish I could get close-ups this clear and detailed!
Love the "war room" set! And it's great to see Tarkin make an appearance! This is a great set. I even love the background. And the custom Aayla is nice. Good to see her in a litle more conservative attire from time to time....personally, I would find her usual outfit a little, uh, distracting during briefings!
Although, I think you missed an opportunity to put some holographic planets or some kind of war room/battle map here.
The Obi Wan hologram looks good, but should be more blue and more translucent.
Nice use of a comic book image, but it took me a while to figure out what it was supposed to be (even with the dialogue).
Although I realize you obviously were being economical, actual dialogue between Tarkin and Rykrof might have been preferable here.
Why is Tylin Gere such a putz! He's not very sympathetic to his friend. God, I hate that guy! And why is he still wearing a Coruscant security uniform? Haven't they found anything USEFUL for him to do?
Great composite shot of the shuttle!
Maybe you should have put the shuttle into the shot of Rhen Var to visually underscore Rykrof's arrival.
The shot of Rykrof and Ralbarr really showcases how great the custom Rkykrof looks in his clone uniform. A new custom, obviously, with the AT TE gunner uniform??
maybe Ryrkrof should have brought just a few troops with him. No offense to the guy, but, on his own, what does he offer, especially since there's already a Jedi mster and clone commander on Rhen Var?
Love the scene on Tibrin! You always do a good job with Dooku, one of my favorite characters. Wow, lots of Ishi Tibs! So you're the one who bought them all!
And, of course, those rocks of yours still look gorgeous! Damn you! I need some!!!!
I really love the Republic base! Wow! And even the hologram of the troops looks terrific (a little more translucent, though, might have made it just a tad better.)
GREAT action shot with the tanks!! You're fx/compositing skills are truly mind-blowing! This baby is ACTION PACKED!
The AT TE is an amazing feat! but you obscure it a little too much here with smoke and with narrow camera angles. don't be afraid to show it off!
The action shots are all first rate! This is phenomenal work! Love it!
Wish we had seen at least a glimpse of the padawan in an earlier scene before he died, if only in the background. But it's cool nevertheless...
I MUST know where you get these great images of flames and fire....you'll have to email them to me or post them in the JD photo reference thread.
Durge kicking [censored]! Awesome!
Ralbarra V. Durge! Double awesome!
I don't get Mundi's line, "we have no time for prisoners". Does he mean taking prisoners? why bother? who is there to take prisoner? Droids? Durge? Besides, those who are retreating usually don't take prisoners!
The ending is great! The only thing missing from the shot of Rykrof and Ralbarra chillin' is a couple of brews between them.
Love Rykrof's defeatist monologue. Only minor question/quibble - as I said, I don't read any EU, but was there really a battle for tatooine? Sounds like a lame idea, why would anyone bother fighting over Tatooine? There's no Republic presence in TPM and no Imperial presence in ANH...it seems like it should have been untouched by war.
The sidious ending is great! Very ominious...excellent compositing....
This really was worth the wait! The most visually stunning photonovel yet. You really do keep outdoing yourself....it's thrilling!
I'm assuming we'll see more about Rhen Var, with the results of the separatist victory and the Sith temple?
Should Mundi have told Rykrof about their real mission, though? Or is that coming in another adventure?
Anyway.....thanks for your hard work, I, for one, enjoy the hell out of these babies!
Bravo!
There were some comments/questions that he had there that hadn't been touched on here yet, so I thought it would be ok to reply to his post here too since I know a lot of you are familiar with his interactive photonovel.
Lance, thanks for the in-depth review, I really appreciate it. It's people like you that I make these for. I'll try to answer your questions as best I can -
(1) - Aayla definitely needs a different outfit sometimes like you said, so I used the Depa Bilaba body and tweaked it some for this outfit.
(2) - The War Room on Coruscant could have been better, next time I'll add in more background holo-images like you said.
(3) - The dead Gungans could have been shown better in the holo image. I should have done better with that.
(4) - I originally had some dialogue between Tarkin and Rykrof, but cut it out just because I was afraid the story was getting too long?
(5) - Tylin Gere, man you hate this guy don't ya! I think eventually you will value or respect his role more, he will end up having a huge impact on this series.
(6) - The Rykrof is still a SA AOTC Clone body, but with the AT-TE gunner shoulder pad.
(7) - Rykrof probably should have brought some more troops with him. He was really being sent to Rhen Var for his leadership and tactical abilities. The Tarkin dialogue originally stated that. I should have left that line in probably.
(8 ) - For the AT-TE, I actually added in so much smoke/effects to cover up my editing problems in cutting and pasting images of it. But I think I have it figured out now where I won't have to do that so much. I'm still a rookie when it comes to editing.
(9) - The Padawan was a last minute addition. I wanted to show an inexperienced Jedi get whacked!
(10) - I get the flames and explosion images off of google. I just do an image search for "explosion" or "fire", etc.
(11) - The prisoner line was referring to Durge. Ki Adi Mundi was just letting Ralbarr to not even think about it.
(12) - More will be revealed about Rhen Var in a upcoming photonovel in the Clone Wars, and eventually way down the road a lot more will happen with Rhen Var.
(13) - The Tatooine battle is a tribute to the "Battlefront" game where you can battle on Tatooine.
(14) - I am really glad that you enjoyed this one, especially the ending. Did you spot Alyssa at the end with the baby?
