Terrible Previously Released Figures

[Angry Ewok]

That weird mark is supposed to be the weathering from where the Jawa's restraining bolt was. Yes, the chronology of it is ****** up, but its a lame figure, anyway.

I agree with Jesse, you really have to look at this from the point of view we held of Hasbro's potential at the time each figure was created... The POTF2 Han Solo, for example, was cool as hell, and completely accurate in my opinion, while the Luke looked like complete ass. The Stormtrooper was good, too. The TIE Fighter was perfect. Obi-Wan was good. Greedo was cool.

POTF2 Leia Monkey Face failed miserably, as did POTF2 Luke. R2D5 is probably the most awful of the bunch simply because that piece of **** still hasn't seen its day... When are we going to get a decent one? The biggest disapointments in the more recent were easily the Second Issue Hoth Trooper and Snow Trooper - both of these were pre-posed even worse than their first attempts... horribly disapointing for everyone.

The top of my list, and yet to be named here...

Jabba the Hutt.

Jabba has yet to really get a beautiful recreation the way some figures have. The Bo'marr monk is absolutely perfect, and it was made in 1997. It's a damned shame when the Vintage Jabba from 1983 stands up as the best one yet, STILL.

[Mitsukara]

Yes, as I said, my view of rather a figure is rubbish is dependant on rather it did something wrong that was really uneccesary/easily avoided given the standards at the time. R5D4 could've been a nice, normal figure made in the same fashion as the first POTF2 R2D2, but no, for some reason he splits in half and fires this yellow plastic thing and has cannons on his legs. Thus, rubbish.

The POTF2s really didn't need to be buff, that was a marketing idea the same as action features and other intentional crud thrown in to "excite kids." But the buffness only periodically really killed the figures (Rebel Fleet Trooper), and some got away okay in spite of it (most Han Solos), at least at the time. The same can again be said of action features, which can totally ruin a figure (Saga Deluxe Slashing Anakin's faults, other than that headsculpt, can all be traced down to the action feature) or just be a mild impediment (Bespin Duel Luke is a good example).

People's standards are different, and a figure someone loves someone else might think is garbage, so this is just my view of what really makes a figure sucky. But too, the faults that plagued entire lines overall do make those figures less cool from a right-now standpoint; so it's a matter of certain lines/groups having universal/common flaws, but only some of them truly being bad figures for it when viewed in perspective.

Personally, I kind of like General Lando in a way, but I can't call him a good figure either.

[Jesse James]

VOTC 3PO in my opinion looked like the best 3PO,would you rather have a buff 3PO than a normal non-buff one?Also the Commtech Stormtrooepr was ok.

Of 3PO sculpts that exist, I think ONLY the POTF2 sculpt is worse than the VOTC (off the top of my head here)...

I prefer the following WAY over the VOTC sculpt:

-Vintage (ironically, it seems better to me in proportions)
-POTD 3-pack 3PO
-Rem. Limbs 3PO
-Tusken Attack 3PO (Flashback)
-ROTS 3PO
-Escape Pod 3PO (The sculpt is fantastic...  Paint's so-so, but represents a dirty 3PO well)
-MMC 3PO (my favorite "Classic" 3PO at the moment, though the Ewok Throne one should replace this)

That's a pile I just think are better than VOTC...  I just had my review of VOTC 3PO posted in my Review-A-Thon here last week, so check out the reviews section of our site here at JediDefender.com for my in-depth reasoning as to why VOTC 3PO sucks, but the short version is:

-Caved-in Chest
-Skinny scrawny sculpt
-pin-head with completely inaccurate detailing
-goofy, unnatural pose

The paintjob's not bad on him...  Probably the most accurate one so far for a dirty ANH 3PO (not good for 3PO in ESB or ROTJ though).  The pose I see where they were going with it, but it really ultimately fell flat...  Mostly the "walking" legs kill it over the arms.  I'll add to my sculpt dislike the fact that the arm pistons from the bicep to forearm aren't "separate" whereas they are on other figures and that looks better and more realistic.  No C-3PO has that yet though,just R-3PO for some reason if I'm not mistaken.

And of course articulation's a mess on this overpriced figure...  This C-3PO managed to have less articulation than a number of others when joints are easy to do on figures like this, they just require a pin & socket style of joint built into the figure...

Anyway, VOTC C-3PO is one of my all-time worsts I think...  It's up there with Buff Fleet Trooper and Monkey Faced Leia for me.  Just attrocious.  Fortunately 3PO has a lot of versions of himself available to pick from that are better, just none are ever truly great...  Even the Endor 3PO coming up isn't spectacular...  Give him swivels at his biceps and wrist joints, and I'd sing some better praise on him I think.

[RichardTheBloody]

I can'T believe no one's mentioned Aayla Secura and Cmdr Bacara from ROTS yet...Aayla looked ok, until you got her out of the bubble. She has no elbows, and only one swivel bicep, but she has swivel wrists (oooh) Add in the fact they used the cheap rubbery plastic for her entire body and the fact her swivel torso came apart just below her shirt, so she fell apart before she even took a dive, thanks to her rubbery legs. Also the second one i got to keep MOC had her belly turned 180 degrees...she had the hollow in the small of her back where her bellybutton should have been. As for Bacara, do i really need to detail the flaws here? Fixed left arm at 90 degrees, with only a swiveljoint, when the right arm is fully articulated properly. NO knee articulation, but they gave him ankle joints...WHY?! And the less said about the "action" feature, the better. They could and SHOULD have just put his armor on the #6 clone body if they wanted one with an action feature done right, or just slapped the armor on the 41 SA body (like i did). I don't understand why the Neimoidian Warriors warmed pegs tho, I got two of them, but i kept em MOC. I think they've got potential to make cool looking alien jedi, or bounty hunters...Even swap the head with the Tank Gunner (another one on my list of stinkers) and make a Proto Boba from between AOTC and when he finally donned Jango's armor.

[Artoo]

I meant besides ROTS 3PO Jesse James. But you can think what you want!

[Mitsukara]

I think nemoidians warmed not because they were bad figures, but because they were Nemoidians.

Hasbro of late seems to enjoy making decent figures of side and small characters, but generally stiffs the primary characters (Commtech Luke and Han, and an awesome new Garindan from scratch). And while it's great to have the good figures of the side characters, the main characters don't pegwarm simply because they're the main characters; they're what kids and casual fans buy.

Even HaV ROTS Anakin #2 reprinted shortly after a version that had the cool cloak accessory probably hasn't pegwarmed, simply because he's Anakin Skywalker (or a pile of animal waste assembled in such a way as to resemble
him).

Oh yeah, speaking of which:

I'm sorry, but this figure was utter rubbish the first time. A crippling action feature, horrid sculpting... that about covers it. I'm not going to totally gripe about the originally inaccurate lightsaber or even the lame way they "fixed" it by giving him a Dooku saber he could barely hold, either. Oops, I think I just did >.<

So then they improve him by removing the red lightsaber altogether, and giving him a groovy cloak; and then they reprint the first version. And they pack him in with all kinds of stuff. Awesome.

[roron corobb]

I think the list would be shorter if the question was the better previously released figures. My list is way to big to post with pictures. I would even include some of the EVO figures with how Hasbro cut corners with articulation etc. Take the Anakin to Vader one. E2 Anakin has the cool arm articulation, but no ankle articulation and E3 Anakin has the swival arm (bad IMO) articulation with the ankle articulation, WHY? I think they would have saved money if the legs on both were the same, because Anakin didn't change his pants and boots from E2 to E3. Yes, they are one of the best versions we have of Anakin, but it could have been much better and would have took less R&D time to make.

Also what is the deal with the Clone Troopers? The 41 SA Clone is good, but he should have the hip articulation of the AT-TE Gunner for the perfect SA Clone Trooper. Plus the quick draw Clone is pathetic. All the Clone Troopers are the same, so why didn't Hasbro make one SA version with the Gunner hips and then add all the differences to that one version? That would have knocked out 22 different figures that they made with different version with one perfect version with minor changes. Would have saved them money IMO and made us happier, but who knows what Hasbro's R&D department is thinking when it comes to this stuff.

roron corobb

[Mitsukara]

Well, yes, many problems plague the line continuously.... and there are some things that just make you scratch your head along the development process because they make no sense whatsoever.

Personally, my theory in what to post in this thread has been figures that I could laugh at, because they just looked and/or performed so horribly. I mean, Deluxe Screaming Anakin with Giant Robes, Harness, and broken arms?! Crippled by an action feature to ice the cake. I really had a ball the first time I saw it because it's just so awful that it's hilarious to even look at.

So anything that might fall into that kind of horribleness is worth posting here in my opinion After all, while everybody loves articulation and mostly hates action features, a Star Wars figure has some value if it at least makes a nice-looking statue. But if it looks horrible, or it's action feature is so bad that it cripples the figure in a completely noticeable way, that figure is true crap in my opinion.

[JACKOFTRADZE]

Figures I would like to never see at reatil again that currently are:

500th Vader
ROTS Yoda
Slash attack Anakin
Kicking Obi Wan
Missle Fire Destroyer
Droid Attack R2
Cantina Han body from POTF
Luke Tatooine body from POTF
POTJ Chewie

All terrible and waseting shelf space.............

[Mitsukara]

Hey, POTJ Chewie and 500th Vader aren't so bad. POTJ Chewie makes a great statue if nothing else, the sculpting is excellent, and 500th Vader is an awesome Vader if you handle him the right way (there's an easy method for getting the helmet to stay on and stay removeable, not to mention that you could just glue it on if you don't want it removeable; and his hand can too hold the lightsaber, it's just flimsy; he does better with a bigger-handled one like ROTS Vader's saber, though).

Luke... they really should've updated that body. It was great back then... in 1999... but he really needs wrist cuts these days at least. Cantina Han, argh, couldn't they have given him some new arms at least? Or a new chest.

Slash Attack Anakin and Kickin Obi Wan are two of the biggest pieces of trash in the line. Ugly and poorly functional as a toy, that makes a terrible action figure right there.

As I said... it should either look good, or play good (and my idea of good means being able to do a lot of things with it/ at least function for it's basic purpose), if not both. If it can't do either, what's the point? "Slashing Attack!" Or to gaze at Lando's chest of steel. You know you want it. Or Monkey Face Leia.... which you can melt and still looks just as good, and will probably hold the weapons just as good

Incidentally, if you hate 500th Vader, I challenge you to try making Monkey-Face Leia hold her weapons and see if you really think she's any better... she can hardly keep her skirt and cape on and stand up at the same time.

This figure skims my garbage list because his sculpting (read: headsculpt and cape) was decent... but he's just so horribly assembled that he warrants hatred:


Problems:
Those arms are stuck like that. That cape DOES NOT stay on. There is nothing to keep it on but gravity and that means he has to be at just the right angle. His stance is awful, he can barely stand up. I have him leaning in my display.The action feature is murder- you squeeze his legs together and he swings his lightsaber like he's had about 50 cans of Jolt Cola in the last hour- it's hilarious just to even do it. And it's quite easy for him to throw his lightsaber doing this, too.

I pronounce him Count "SuperSlap" Dookie.

On the plus side, the head would make for good customs, and the Sideous hologram is nice- nicer than the minifig we're getting these days in fact.