I'm going to prison.
Not quite yet, but someday, perhaps not in the too distant future. I haven't quite selected the crime yet either, I believe it will come from the following list:
vandalism - Used to be they just had no stopping signs up outside of the front of stores but ****wads abused that and parked there saying there's no sign saying they can't park there
So now there's both signs, no stopping, no parking. Still the piano-tied-to-my-ass crowd sits there, in the middle of a weekend day on the premise that
they'll only be a minute. Nuh-uh folks, doesn't work that way. So I figure I'm about to start taking a large, sharp metal bar and proceed to "key" any ****tard that sits in his car under the premise of it'll only be a minute and I'm too ******* lazy/important to park my car.
assault - you know when oblivious morons stop in the middle of the aisle or at the junction of numerous aisles with precisely zero consideration for anyone else? Yeah, well, I'm not as big as I used to be, but for about 90% of the people if I drop a shoulder into them they're going to be going ass over teakettle into the soup display. At what point did it become ok to be absolutely inconsiderate of others? Same deal in the mall, at what point did it become my responsibility to get out of the way of a group of three walking abreast of each other? No more folks, be prepared to land on your ass.
assault with a weapon - This is primarily for dumbass drivers out there. Don't signal when you're already in the turning lane if you didn't prior to entering it, we've already figured it out. Don't get part way into the turning lane and stay partly in the main lane slowing down traffic. Don't go slowly through the light when there's 15 other cars behind you. We're not retired yet *******. Don't cut me off and give me the finger. If you do, I'll get out at the next stop light, walk up to your car and shoot your ass. Dead.
vehicular manslaughter - sure, pedestrians have the right of way, in cross walks, at intersections. They don't have the arbitrary right to walk out into the roadway at any point and fire a dirty look at oncoming traffic. I'm sorry you can't afford a vehicle, get the **** out of my way. And what is up with crossing roads diagonally? Take your sweet ******* time and you're likely to find my bumper residing in your small colon, ok?
vandalism II - I admit it, the parking spaces are small. But what makes you so almighty ******* important that you don't need to a) park straight b) park in a single space rather than going two feet over the line delineating the space in front of you c) put the middle of the line in the center of your car? No, you aren't that important. No, your car isn't that nice. No, you're not allowed to be that lazy.
Whatever happened to consideration for others? Why'd most people just throw it away. You have to work for what you get, nobody
deserves anything.
*******.
