I see what's happening here... You two are both fighting over my love.

That's because I had love from both of you waiting in my inbox when I got home tonight - for the same product no less.

Furthermore, it was on a product that I already bought at Costco about 3 months ago!
BUT, I haven't opened it yet, and I believe I may still have the receipt floating around here somewhere, so I'll see if I can return it, and pimp some love back to one of you whores. If that's the case, Scott - sorry bud, but the "mysteriousness" of the man they call Virex is just too intriguing to pass up, so I'll probably have to politely decline your offer and be Fatty's beeotch instead. Not to mention I already screwed up his first attempt to hump my leg, so I need to get this one right if I'm able to swing it.
I'll keep you guys posted, and thanks again for making a fella like me feel so special... Valentine's Day comes early for me this year, I guess. Just please, no more baseball "innuendos" Scott. I'm nobody's catcher! Thanks.
